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<HTML><HEAD><TITLE>Rick's Page Of Recovery And Who Knows What</TITLE></HEAD><BODY><center><H2>MY STOREY</H3></CENTER>Hiya, I is Rick and I is a recovering addict. I will now embark on a little story of me being me. I am 46 years old and just finally becoming a member of the human race. In the past my life was mostly wrapped up in the getting and the using of drugs. I don't mean 46 years of non-stop of this type of life, I did have intervals of not Using. Actually I had a few times where I tried to be a normal human being in a relationship (using the relationship as my drug) But that Would only work for awhile. Then their were the times I tried to be a biker, rancher, cowboy, golfer, the list goes on and on, they all worked for awhile but the excitement soon faded, and I would be back out using again. Every time I went back out it would get worse. I would sink to a lower level than before. I sank so far down the last time, that if I was to go back out using I will surely die!! I am not a bad person at heart I can not even put down a sick animal when it is suffering, I never hunted, and I feel sorry for the wildlife. My heart would go out to the elderly who are lonely and suffering, I can actually feel their pain. I don't like to see others suffer, being it human or animal or even a bug. I have been clean and sober since May 9th 1998. I am starting to feel like a exposed nerve, all the feelings I have been pushing down are now coming up, this is the point where I sink or swim, luckily My Higher Power or God as I choose to call him, or her, gave me the power to choose. So I have finally made the choice to swim!!!!!! I am attending AA and I also chair a NA meeting on Mirc #NAchat on the undernet. I have decided to better myself by finally accepting the help that has been offered so freely to me in the past. </BODY></HTML>